Someones fire alarm keeps going off somewhere and if I have to leave my apartment because of them I will be pissed.

Greetings and Salutations.

Today was my first day back to work after a glorious five day long weekend. It seems working for The Man means I get Remembrance Day off, so I decided to take Thursday and Friday off as well, since my doctor is only open Tues-Thursdays. Lame.

I usually like to let all my doctor questions build up before I go, most times I even bring a list so I don't forget anything. (This time I forgot to make a list so I forgot to bring up my headaches. Oops.)

My main doctor question was about my feet. I'm sure I've complained about them on here before. For years now they've hurt if I spent too much time on them, but in the past I didn't really do much, so I only noticed it when I went shopping or something. But then last year when I went back to Ye Olde Jobby, I was on my feet for 8 hours a day, and I almost died. My feet got insanely sore, I even bought a pair of $184 shoes and they didn't entirely help.

Even now in my new job where I'm sitting down for about 64% of the day, my feet still ache. I tend to complain alot, so usually mom is all, yea yea, whatever you say complainy. One time she was asking me something about something (you know how mothers are, always asking questions), and she asked if it was my arch that was sore, and I was all DUDE, it's my whole foot.

I go to the doctors and I say my feet are sore and instantly he already knows what the problem is, plantersomething or other, and he gives me magical pills that sometimes makes everything better (though when I get to the point where the magic pills have worn off, my feet seem even more in pain, just because I hadn't had all day to try to ignore them.)

SCENE: Mother comes home, and discusses Drs diagnosis with daughter.

MOM: So what did the doctor say.
ME: I have some thing . . .planter something or other
MOM: Oh, plantar fasciitis?
ME: Dude, as if you knew that!
MOM: Well, yea, I've been on the magical foot pills for two years now.
ME: All this time I was in pain and you knew there was a magical cure!?
MOM: Well I had asked you it if was your arch and you were all no no no.

ugh.
(end scene)

Yet another thing to add to the "should've listened to mom" chart. le sigh.

This concludes the lame blog post of the night, since I have to clean the insanity that I like to call my apartment.

For all y'all non reading types, here are two videos that I found quite enjoyable. Side note - I actually said y'all outloud today, and instantly I thought to myself, "Dear lord, I spent too much time in the Valley." Is y'all even considered a Valley thing?

Numero Uno, Lady Gaga - Bad Romance. I have no clue how many times I've watched this in the past 24 hours. Its fabulous.



Numero Two-o, a classic, William Shatner - Rocket Man.



Oh wait! I totally forgot to mention that The Dainty Squid is having a giveaway! I got two pouches from her about this time last year and I still completely love them.

Dynamite with a Laser Beam

I'm pretty much all talk, no action. (Hell, most times I'm hardly even all talk, hence my two week silence) There are nights I can't sleep because of all the stuff I want to get done, either cleaning wise, organization wise, or even awesome wise will just be running through my head, so I'll sit in bed and write out a to-do list. Then I set my note book on the floor, get back under the covers, and eventually fall asleep, since my mind is no longer running 90 mph. But then I never look at that list again. I don't think I have ever completed a to do list I've made. Going through my old notebooks I find random lists, usually all with the same basic things on them, pick up laundry, dishes, do some school project, whatever.

So last week when I started telling people I wanted to make a rainbow cake, part of me, the part that always makes all those damn lists but never sees any of the stuff accomplished, knew it was never going to happen. But the other part of me, the part that wanted to make and eat a rainbow cake, decided to be all "fuck you ms. negativity!".

While I was home for the weekend I threw my cake supplies on my moms grocery list - vanilla cake mix, food colouring, eggs. (I was just going to swipe some of her eggs, but it seems we had eaten the last ones the night before). I decided to make the cake in Ottawa, without mother supervision, so I could enjoy it without people eating it all on me.

I have no clue where I had originally seen this, but I somewhat followed the post from Omnomicon. Pretty much last week for the inspiration pictures, and then the measuringness. That recipe is for a diet cake, but she used Gel Food Colouring, which makes the cake look 1,000 times more bad assed. As I'm going through this I realize that my pictures are similar to hers somewhat, but how many ways can one photograph the cake making process? I already said hers is more bad assed, sheesh.

Anywho, on with the cake!

First you mix up the vanilla mix, separate it into six bowls, and food colour them. Don't follow the numbers on the box, they're lame. Then you pour the mix into the centre of the pan. Don't over think it, it's a very simple task, don't play with it, or spread it around. It has everything under control.




Then you put the cake in the oven. I'm not one for preheating the oven, usually because half the time I forget, but this time I did. The box tells me to put the cake in for 30 minutes, but I set my timer for 20, because I suck at all things oven. 20 minutes goes by, and of course, my cake is slightly burnt. (One might think I would be able to smell the burning, but when I moved in I put my kettle on the back burner, and when I smelled burning while cooking I had assumed it was just my cooking as usual, but then a few weeks later I realized I had melted my kettle to the stove. So now I just smell plastic when cooking) (When thinking up this post I was all, huzzah, finally, pictures for the people, but man, I'm a real chatty cathy in this post, sorry.)

Burntness.


Then I covered the cake in my favourite icing even that I can never find anywhere, expect for in the store in my building.

one cake

two cake
mmm icing . . .

Then, time to eat!

le fin!

What good is a wooden dog? Oh, sure they swim better, but what am I gonna call him, Splinter?

Greetings friends,

I do plan on posting at some point before the year is over, I have actually been doing stuff so I'm not sure why I haven't been blogging, but oh wells. This post isn't to tell you all the magical things I've been up to lately but to ask for your assistance.

I have October 30th off, so for a three day Hallowe'en celebration I plan on laying on the couch watching movies the whole time. So what I would like from you is ideas of non scary, non overly bloody, non overly childishly lame Hallowe'en-y movies to watch. They don't have to be childrens movies and they don't have to be set exactly on Hallowe'en, but I'm a wuss and I'm not a fan of unnecessary gore.

Suggestions of awesome "teen" movies similar to Clueless, Heathers, John Hughes movies etc will also be allowed.

On my list so far:
Hocus Pocus (obviously)
Ernest Scared Stupid (obviously)
It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown
Casper
Buffy The Vampire Slayer (the movie and maybe the Hallowe'en episodes)
Nightmare Before Christmas (shush!)
Edward Scissorhands
Beetlejuice
. . .

A brief conversation between me and my cousin
ME: Do you know any good childrens Hallowe'en movies?
Vron: How old are these children?
Me: Me.

(after a laugh she goes on to say Google it, and then Winnie the Pooh movies. le sigh)

Ok let's go folks. Ideas. Chop chop.

Let's Play A Game I Like To Call "What In The Jesus Christ Is That?!"

I have finally commenced my scanning project. About a month ago I borrowed four picture albums from my aunt, and dear god, it's going to take me forever to get through them. We had been looking through them one night, and she was going to start giving away the pictures she didn't want or had duplicates of, so I asked her to wait until I had a chance to scan them.

I decided to start with the smallest album tonight, just to ease myself into this project. The cover is this creepy clown/ballerina with our family names in sticker form. The classy part of it is it seems the sticker set ran out after two N's, so the other two N's are M's trimmed down.

It has a few old school pictures, but mainly newspaper clippings, the majority of which are deaths. The first page is black and white scans of pictures from 1965 and earlier. Obviously they are in fabulous quality.

I have no clue how the hell I missed this when we had been going through the albums originally.

So without further ado, here is a picture of my Great-Uncle Pick . . .

with the head of a fucking Minotaur!

Do you see what I'm seeing? I don't know what I'm seeing. My brain is exploding. Is this some sort of joke? Is this an actual animal? Where is its body? At first I was thinking it was . . . I don't even know, a bear or something, but then I noticed his hands were grabbing onto the Minotaurs horns. Did he knock down the tree with that thing?

What the hell.

A Painfully Simple Conversation Between Me and My Mom

ME: Did you get that email I sent you?
MOM: No, what was it?
ME: A cat.
MOM: Did you get that email I sent you?
ME: No, what was it?
MOM: A cat.

Hers was a completely lame video of a cat "playing" the piano. I'm not linking it.
Mine was completely awesome, and you should definitely look at it if you like cats. I've put it as my pc background because it totally rocks my sock.

Huzzah for Kaylah at The Dainty Squid for finding that picture.

A Brief Conversation I Had With Myself That My Necklace Overheard And Decided To Respond To

ME: I really enjoy this Reitmans necklace. It's not completely cheap like my other Reitmans necklace with all the paint chipping off already. And it's not ugly cheap like the two Reitmans necklaces I got for 2 bucks each just because I needed my total to go over a certain amount so I could save some money in the end. And it's not totally weird like my other Reitmans necklace that I only wear with one shirt and I'm not sure if I'm supposed to shorten it myself or something. And it's not crappily made like the other Reitmans necklaces I've bought that have been thrown out because they sucked.

78% of the colours are actually enjoyable. Look at this green bead. It looks like pea soup but I totally love it. And this red bead. That’s a nice red. Maybe I should start wearing this out in public instead of just as a "Tada! This regular everyday outfit is now a work outfit due to the fact that I've included a necklace." A coworker did complement it today.

Yep, I'm pretty sure I really like this necklace.

NECKLACE: Fuck you, douchebag!

*Necklace then proceeds to break*

ME: UGH.


I'm now officially boycotting Reitmans necklaces. Jerks.

Do you suffer from long-term memory loss? I don't remember.

I'm now starting a new segment - Thoughts That Are Just Too Long For Twitter. Things that are too long for me to shove into twitter, lame enough that I really shouldn't be wasting your time on, but I'm going to anyways. It's called boredmando for a reason.

I had emailed my mom the xkcd link from two posts ago, because her lack of computer skills is completely scary. She has even forgotten how to Copy and Paste. (Once my aunt mentioned Cut and I was like "Gah! Don't tell mom about that!")

Some times I'll email her links and she won't look at the because the text isn't hyperlinked.

When I went home last weekend I noticed the link I had sent her was written down on a piece of paper.

ME: Hey, what's this? Did the link not work in the email?
MOM: Oh no, it worked, I just wanted to write it down in case I wanted to share it with somebody.
ME: Why would you write it down? You know how to create a bookmark, you use them all the time. Plus, you wrote down xcd, not xkcd. Also, you throw out everything. This paper won't be on this desk for long.

I can't remember moms response. It was probably laugher, or mocking me to one of the pets. We do that alot.